I swatted my own leg with the implements, the Pearl's advocate using in their book, chosen for infants one year and younger! The Pearl's believe literally in the bible's teaching to beat your children with a rod. On their website they refer to having beat their daughter at 6 months old with a switch simply because she was crying while they were trying to sleep. The red lines are from me "switching" myself with a weeping willow branch (the exact same kind they beat their infant daughter with) I took off the neighbors tree. The red splotch is from the wooden spoon I smacked myself with. I won't be going any further into the teachings of the book, my facebook friends will be having nightmares from my quotes of the book already, but instead I will be fighting in opposition to many christian beliefs that parents should be beating their kids with a "rod." Just so you know, I only flicked my wrist and did not beat myself. These marks weren't hard to produce and it stung pretty bad.
My first argument, and stemming from a recent conversation I had with a christian, is related to the idea that "because of Christ's death the old testament teachings are no longer valid." My daughter had titled her blog "The Bible is Over-The-Top with The Stoning" and many had expressed that she could not use the Old Testament in her arguments against christianity. I have rarely met a christian that doesn't believe in spanking and quickly quotes the Old Testament for support of their belief in such; however, when my daughter quoted it for stoning, it suddenly wasn't valid. Which is it? Can we use the Old Testament or not? Is it more along the lines of "you can use the Old Testament when it suits you?"
My second argument is that the King James version had to interpret the original word from Hebrew. Words change from generation to generation, fond, gay, cool, etc....have all changed throughout the years. I knew "rod" would be the same. The original word was "shebet" its meanings are: to branch off, tribe, staff, sceptre, offshoot, and stick. Most of the "teachings" used as proof to beat children are found in proverbs. Most mainstream religious institutions agree proverbs is to be taken figuratively not literally (I honestly think it is all one big made up tale, but for arguments sake, we'll go with one book having many different genres). If we exchange "rod" for "tribe" in this verse from proverbs 13: 24 "He who spareth the tribe, hateth his son" it takes on an entirely different meaning. I published a post a few days ago about where we used to live in Florida. You could certainly call it a "tribe" and our children thrived being part of a "tribe." Being part of a "tribe" and teaching your children to harmoniously live in one sounds right to me! Then of course, one would have to accept the teachings of the Old Testament in order for this argument to even matter. Most christians aren't stoning their kids, sending their daughters into a mob of angry, horny men to be raped, murdering entire villages of men, women, and children, honoring the sabbath day (they changed it to Sunday from Saturday) etc... Why are they insisting society accept it as their right to follow this particular teaching?
Finally, and most probably the reason christians agree with beating their kids is: they want to! It is easier, faster, and helps you get a little exercise. How else are you supposed to deal with your heathen, demon-possessed spawn? They were born with sin in their hearts and deserve to have their parents pull them up by the arm, and while dangling helplessly in the air, have their parents swing harder each time until they submit to their parents will! Parents don't want their tactics changed so they claim "god" says to do it. If Jesus is their example, why aren't they acting like him? If you were driving down the countryside and saw a shepherd in a field tending his sheep, would it shock you to see him raise up his staff with arms stretched as high over his head as he could get them, then pull the staff down with all his might until it slammed onto the back of one of his wayward sheep? Would you cringe with disgust? Would you possibly stop to rescue the sheep? Jesus loved children and even advised that people should strive to be like them! Yet, there are people believing the love, excitement, wonder, and magic only a child possesses should be driven out of them! It is in direct contradiction with the supposed savior of the entire religion!
I understand not all Christians spank their children and that there is some conflict concerning this teaching. However, those that are, need waking up. Too many people claim the god they design (through their own interpretation of texts) leads their lives. It is simply their own desire to do as they see fit, but refuse to claim responsibility for. Children are not born to please their parents or provide some other benefit to them. Children simply mimic their parents. Don't like the way your children act? Maybe you should reevaluate your own self. I am not advocating allowing children to run crazy and raise themselves. Each new stage in a child's development brings on new challenges, but unless you are willing to beat yourself for mistakes, don't hit your kids!
Times for physical discipline do arise. The other day my son ran around the back side of the car while I was loading groceries. The truck backing out next to us never saw him running for the back door to get in. At the very last second, I saw what was happening and was only able to reach the back of Blake's neck and head. I grabbed on as tight as I could and flung him backwards to me. He was so upset because he thought I was trying to choke him! It wasn't until I explained he was about to get run over that he realized I wasn't trying to hurt him. If your 1 year old is headed for a light socket with a fork, certainly a tap on the hand is ok to express what could happen had the fork made contact, but beating a child "into submission" is not ok, it is abuse.
As children age, guidance is needed and sometimes punishments, but if you listen to your child an agreed upon punishment works best. The twins had a disagreement the other week. I had each one whisper into my ear what they thought the other should receive as punishment. Natalie whispered "I think it was an accident mom, Blake should spend 30 seconds of quiet time." Blake said "Mom! She was yelling and she bent my finger back and .....she should get 30 minutes in the corner!" I announced the punishments to them and Blake lit up while Natalie's head dropped. She started to walk to the corner while he trotted to the "chill-out pillow." Then I announced they would be serving the punishment they chose for the other. I told them to learn to settle arguments themselves and this wouldn't happen again. I haven't had them come to me for any disagreements yet. No ritual beatings necessary!
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